Can it really have been six months since offering homespun philosophy to the masses?  

Guess Squatting and Pointing was more distracting and consuming than it was given credit for. 

 Do you know they pay you for officiating the only game God ever meant men to play? 

Game has changed from when this one was offering up a steady diet of breaking balls to acne scarred Catholic school boys in conference championship games. 

This continuous batting order thing; good lord, woulda hated that as a player. 

 You make a traveling team, but you’re never good enough to put the leather on, but you still get to the plate three times a game? I don’t think so. We’re living in such politically correct times we gotta let everybody bat? That’s crap.

 But the games changed for the better too. 

 Never seen a crisper 5-4-3 triple play (actually, never seen another triple play in person, and just three others live on tv),  than the one turned by that Kenosha Lightning squad in the championship of a Barrington Pony Wood Bat tournament game. Preserved a no-hitter for a lefty that reminded me of me. Also don’t remember Eastlick throwing out runners from his knees after going deep in the hole, nor Krupke laying out, with his back to the infield making a seventh-inning game saving catch in deep center either. 

 Coulda happened; Just don’t remember. 

Kenosha rag arm lefty has learned the value of a change-up at an early age, but he tips the pitch with that smirk every time he throws it.

There were a lot of dog games too though, where the gray matter rambled: 

-          UnderArmour has to be among the greatest inventions of mankind; one of the most truly comfortable fabrics in the world.  

-          Does Anne Coulter really believe all that extremist excrement she pronounces? 

-          On a truly hot day, be sure there’s powder in that bag. No fat umpire can even contemplate a tripleheader without some of it down the pants between games. 

 -        When’s Battlestar Galactica coming on again? 

-        You know all the rules and the louder he yells, the more you’re gonna be sure of the rule. 

-      The SciFi Channel really sucks and it has so much potential; they should let me program for them.        

-       The beer-bellied coach with the spaghetti stain on his pullover is just living vicariously through his thirteen-year-old shortstop son

  - The minute it turns personal he’s history

- Plenty of mom’s by the fence who could be MILFs were I to objectify women like that, which is the farthest thing from my mind.        

But not everyone appreciates the greatest game for what it is, especially at this grassroots level, so I won’t belabor the experience.

—September 21, 2008